August 11, 2023
You are frustrated about your William again and it is weighing on your auric field. This man child takes up so much space for you. When he is caring well for you, it is a positive impact. When his treatment is poor, it is a less resourceful impact, but always it is much. It is a combination of the ways your energies merge (you are under his skin as well) how you love, your soul patterning, and the roller coaster of harmony or not. Let us ask for a relationship Guide that may be willing to assist.
What feels like a medicine man steps forward and inspects the bond between William and Anne, then he says, “There is much toxicity in this connection. Powerful. The vines that were once green and young, flexible and full of possibility for where growth could go, have become thick. Hardened. Woody. Breakable. Strong storms tear them down, but it is a deeply rooted tree and shoots form yet again. However, the source is not healthy. Contaminated by jealousies, insecurity towards self and the other, bitterness, unforgiveness, pain of all kinds. This could have been transformed if you were both willing to drink the medicine down to the roots, but you are not both willing.
This is your dear friend, yet his barbs pierce you often. The punctures become infected and never heal because they are unseen by him. They wish to be witnessed in order to heal. Acknowledged. You are his true love and treasure, yet when he reaches for you, his barbed self pierces you. What is to be done about this? What is to be done? One of you must change, and of their own free will. You must harden or he must soften. You must grow a second skin armor to endure his barbs, or he must choose a new costume. You try to sand away his rough edges so you can come close to him without being hurt. He comes near you and does not understand why you are turning from him. You want him to lay the barbed wire costume down and be the softness he is without it, but if this is the protection he has chosen to make his way through the world, who are you to say he must lay it down, choose the needs of the relationship, choose to meet your needs?
If this barbed man chooses himself in ways that make him unapproachable or wounding, it is on you to either ask him to change for the survival of the relationship, or to walk away and choose more fit partners. It is not viable for you to find some way to not be injured. When human flesh wraps round barbed wire, or vice versa, the wire is not harmed. Flesh is. He has always looked like this, at least for as long as you’ve known him. It was you coming closer and closer that has caused the change, for you now feel the impact as you try to cross the fence and get to the man it is protecting. What you see in him is true. Your vision is clear, and you are not confused or reading him wrong. Your wounds are true. They come from Henry. They are given with intention, meant to keep you out. You keep asking him to see how his barbs are hurting you, to care that he is injuring you with them when all you have ever done is love him, and though he does not say anything to you, if he was willing it would be, ‘Good. The structure is doing its job then, sending you back, keeping you out.’
Your William wants love, yes, but from a distance. His truest desire in the now is self protection. You cannot change this, nor should you desire to impinge on his free choice. Is the plane of love better than the plane of isolation? Yes, this is undisputed. And he does not belong to you. You alone belong to you. You do not have someone working with you for the good of the relationship, or even someone who can be concerned with your good. This is the medicine – acceptance. Whether you stay close or walk away is your free choice. I am not uncaring, unfeeling. I do have gentleness towards you. But your well-being has not been fully served by the gentleness of your Guides here. I desire the evolution of all who want to rise, and you, Dear Child, very much want to rise. I have said what I will say. The rest is up to you. You now have the strength and wisdom to apply these truths to receive this medicine. Your wounds will heal and the lesson of trying to merge flesh with wire will stay with you. If ever you meet it again, you will recognize and run. I have spoken and so it is.”